If you were able to join us this past week for our Primary Deep Dive, you heard Alison Breithaupt mention the trio of elements that allow the Montessori ‘magic’ to flow in a classroom. Those essential elements are:
- the training of the guide
- the prepared environment
- and the materials in the classroom.
The materials cannot be used in isolation outside of the context of the other two elements … it simply will not produce the same effect. The topic of this blog is about ‘doing’ Montessori at home and it seems an impossible feat we set before you if all of a sudden the materials – the legacy of Dr. Montessori herself – are now off limits. What if I shared that another harmonious trilogy can be created within the context of your family? It may not produce the same magical melody as we sing in the classroom, but it is a tune of a different nature – and one just as powerful.
You are your child’s very first teacher – their most important guide in life. Schools often lay claim to building a child’s foundation in life. The work we do in the classroom certainly strengthens their base of knowledge, but it is by watching you that your child builds the pillars upon which their foundation rests. You model the values in life that are most worthy to prioritize.
This is a good time to do a quick self-reflection and ensure the habits you are modeling are the ones you want your children to mirror their life after. Is competition for attention at your house fiercely divided among work, household chores or responsibilities, technology, or hobbies? Is your child learning what a healthy work/life balance ratio is? Are they encouraged to make meaningful family contributions in a way that helps them feel valued and worthy? Are spaces in your home designed for your child to create independent routines? Are hooks low enough to hang backpacks and coats, clothes and utensils in accessible drawers, and healthy snacks within reach without support? These minor adjustments can have a resounding effect on your family's rhythms. Is your child learning to have a wholesome relationship with technology – one that teaches them how it can be used as a purposeful tool for progress? Is your family building a collection of hobbies together – ones that will create lasting connections and joint memories?
After looking at the values you model through your actions, the second element to consider is the words we speak. This directly correlates to the message above because sometimes the words our children hear come in through their ears, and other messages they feel directly pierce their heart. If you are familiar with Don Miguel Ruiz’s book, The Four Agreements, you will remember his first agreement, from which all other agreements stem, is to be “impeccable with our words.” This simple act of striving for impeccability will create a channel from which positive energy can flow freely. Just as the bell work in our classroom trains your child’s ear to hear Perfect Pitch, let your words train your child’s ears to listen for truth, wisdom, and love.
The final element needed to round out the trio of our good works and our words is that of presence. Know that every day you show up for your child is enough. The love we have runs so deep that just being there to share the laughs and catch their tears is enough. Teach them how to hold space in their heart for one another when you have to be apart and make the time you have with one another a gift simply by being present.
Authentic experiences come directly from the heart. They speak intentions and truths to your child in a way that no other lesson can. Incorporating Montessori’s philosophy into your home doesn’t have to involve doing anything other than checking the intention behind what you are already doing.